千四百六十八： Month End

As it should happen, I made a new cute friend this month before its over (as expected according to the 1 new one per month theory). As usual, the start is all sweetness & friendliness. But. Let's see if we stay friends even.

sighz.

I still got 12 months more before I can really leave Sg. I don't think I can take the pressure of 12 more new ones.

I been thinking alot today, I don't think I want to go out with some people anymore. I am only the substitute when they feel lonely as well, or when they don't get to go out with the people they really want to go out with. All talk of trying hard to get free stuff *for me* doesn't mean anything when they are willing to spend money to get the same thing for other people when they know I want it more. But, it's their choice to do what they want, it's my choice that I don't put up with such talk (and action) also. I kinda envy some people's carefree lifestyle that I can't lead now since I have a bf, but come to think of it, thats maybe just fulfilling only for the moment and you will still end up being lonely emotionally.

Let's start another countdown. 23rd Aug is .. 25 days away? to spend 10 days together. I think in total I will only be meeting Ryo for a total of 42 days this year (2007). thats about 1 month 12 days? I am surprised that its really actually so little. Anyone else want to be in a long distance relationship?