Back to work again. Its really mundane and the feeling is especially worse when u've just come back from a holiday. Wished I could be joining the sixoneders at their activities right now, but I really should stop thinking about it.

Winni said I had become more mature since b4 I went. I looked older than before too. Was it so apparent? He said I used to be cuter but now I seemed to have aged. Or grown up? Hah.. I guess its both good and bad. I have to let go of the fact that I can't possibly be cute forever, but I guess circumstances have made it such that I have to be one of the more mature ones in the program, having to take care of all their admin stuff like money, and HR matters. Forced to live alone, having to cope with all matters without the ready aid of friends, I guess I have grown up slightly if not a lot.

Am I able to be alone now? More so, if not all the time yet. Too much alone time still drives me crazy, I’ll admit and I guess crying suicide just means I need attention if u really listen to me. I guess I really should start thinking of other people around me for once.

He's more affectionate after the Singapore trip, I guess he really enjoyed the break. He even initiated watching a movie after dinner which was quite rare. Usually I’m the one suggesting such things. He doesn’t mind spending money on expensive dinners with me (although I quite sim tia when he does that) and he forgets the amount of money I’m supposed to return him even though its not small amt. Perhaps I should stop ruining my relationships and settle down.