well. i noe now. he's out of my life. at least for now. dun ask me how i found out. i did and in a moment of clarity, i saw everything clearly. it hurts, hurts realli bad, just like another knife down my heart again. must focus now on not feeling depressed, not going to let myself struggle in that vortex of depression again. so hard to get out of it, it could drown me forever this time. no one to pull me out liao..

so sad so sad.. :(

sorri dear KM, i noe and understand how u feel.. i would have been a wonderful fren to u if u had oni given me some time to let my enthusiasm die off.. new frens are always exciting, and u wanna spend as much time with them as possible to get to noe them better. after the novelty wears off.. they are just frens who'll be there for u. i realli dunno wat to do now, how to nurse my hurt. if u think we'll be great as frens.. we will be but there can nv be a future liao.. i shut the door of my heart from u and u won't be able to enter again. .. although i realli think u would have been my perfect guy and i urs.

i hate to deceive u.. but u prolly would have nv said anithing to me at all urself unless pushed. i'm sorri. but at least i am clear now. it realli is a small thing to forgive me for as compared to wat i have to forgive u for.