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Sunday, August 24, 2003

sorri to say i'm still dazed. for entirely different reasons. he had to spoil everything. the surreal feeling, the closeness, the feeling that i actualli have the right one for the rest of mine life, and that there will be no regrets no matter wat. he had to be a jerk. do wat all guys does best. take away the feeling u're on a cloud i suppose. why why why? i just wanted to be the person to make him smile and to get his hugs. was that too much to ask for? he asked for a step back, back to where we were frens and not anithing like a couple. i knew in my mind he was rite, we should noe each other better first. but wat angered me most was that he had oredi started to like make me feel like i was his gf n then now just dun wan to do anithing cos he's not prepared. am super hurt now.. that i opened my heart to him and he forced me to close it and still wanted the promise that there was a chance for us. i couldn't do it, i just couldn't. i can't look at him or go out as just frens. it's just not the same animore.

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