its been a hellish day.

not a single person replied to my sms-es. has the world disappeared?

spent $20++ on cab fares rushing from one destination to the next. only to reach my interview venue late and to be told to wait till 5pm. 2 hours!! .. i'm very unhappy with myself and everyone.

whole schedule for tuition messed up tonite cos of the delay in the interview. i'm so tired. very very tired.

song of the moment - Ge Qian (jay zhou). its totally wat someone seems to be saying to me rite now..

搁浅

词:宋健彰 曲:周杰伦

久未放晴的天空 依旧留着你的笑容 哭过却无法掩埋歉疚
风筝在阴天搁浅 想念还在等待救援 我拉着线复习你给的温柔
暴晒在一旁的寂寞 笑我给不起承诺 怎么会怎么会你竟原谅了我
我只能永远读着对白 讀著我給你的傷害 我原谅不了我 就请你当作我已不在
我睁开双眼 看着空白 忘记你对我的期待
读完了依赖 我很快就离开

abit pissed off. read some things that i shouldn't but i'll let it pass. and all the while pretending that he didn't noe. i shall be so stupid to say anithing bout her to him next time. he totally been in contact with her and STILL complaining me to her. thanks u. i see u so little le yet u can still find something to complain about. i noe wat to do now.

happy at the sixoneders! they bought me pair of nike sneakers.. lazy to find picts but its kinda sweet, cream with dirty green laces and pink tick. it sounds like it doesn't match but it does. it looks really good!! (ok it sounds like i'm trying to convince myself here.. :P)

off day tomolo, crammed with interview, tuitions and facial. haiz. all alone of cos, hope it'll do me some good.

had quite a gd bday dinner. :) we went to pasta cafe for dinner and after that we wandered around looking at clothes. Nike women has such cool clothing i wanna buy everything up! hp bought me an adidas bag and a nike tank top.. hee.. thanks dear.. veri cool.. will buy u the matching top after i get my pay.. will upload photos tomolo :)

saw a pair of Nike shoes that i like.. think i'll get that instead of adidas sneakers..

bought some japanese mooncakes.. so pretty those things! and very tasty actually..

i'm still feeling kinda sad but at least was busy at work today to take my mind off matters. i dunno how things can be expected to be forgotten in such a short time. but i'll just try to keep things light and let every one stay happy? feels a little awkward. i nv know how to handle these situations. i've kept my promises. am now waiting for the nite of clubbing again..

finally answered calls today.. now waiting for bus to go home.. bah.. boring and cold place.. tomolo i have no plans.. NO PLANS!! so sad...

now i'm blogging in hp's shop at funan.. came here to wait for him to knock off cos didn't feel like going home so early. not a gd day.

had a quick snack of waffles with ed b4 i came over since i had so much time to spare.. the one at raffles city was quite gd :)

prediction came true, chain of events happened as per usual. begins a few weeks b4 my bday and ends just on my bday or the day b4. its very sad... i foresaw it coming, but why always to me>? i didn't do anithing wrong, i just wanna make everyone happy. why me? haiz. i just wanna be happy too. y CAN't i be the happy one for once? haiz.

i dun wanna make anyone feel bad. i just wan everyone to be happy. haiz.

i made $175 today for my tuition of 8.5 hours.. :) quite alot huh.. i wasn't boliao enuff to count that until my mom asked me how much i made today. turns out its so much! .. i should quit my starhub job and do this everyday and i'll be rich.. stupid job ruining my time now.. have to cram my sunday with tuition... so why am i still feeling so poor if i'm making so much money? i seriously can't see the reason. hmm.. i'm not buying any new clothes or wat recently also.. this is very bizarre.. the case of the leaking money..

feel so alone today. haiz. i was actually listening to mp3 at the void deck all alone to while time away when i reached tuition early. it was the first time in the whole week i actually had sometime to myself, the only time i didn't feel like i was rushing for anything. very relaxed, i managed to listen to 4 songs b4 dragging myself off my butt to walk to the elevator.

i nv receive sms-es anymore. today was an exceedingly quiet day. is there such a disease known as loneli-citis?

today's my lunar bday! ok, i only just remembered, but mid autumn fest is on my real bday! (28-sep)

boring day at work, when the hell are they going to give us our IDs?! i'm so sick of going to work all aimless and zobo. when it was nearing end of working hours, this girl (butch) told me that the desk beside her was no one's and i could actually clear it and claim it for my own. took me an hour and i filled 3 wastepaper baskets with all the old trash from at least 4 temps who used to occupy the table! .. the dust and the accumulated papers was quite disgusting. but at least i cleaned up the table. its super neat now, will take a pict of it soon.. monday some pple are coming to audit the call centre for some award thing and we're supposed to wear office wear to look more pro.. i doubt the standard of the calls will actually change though..

i now noe the feeling of being totally ignored and it doesn't feel gd. u begin to hate the person who caused that and start to plot ways of revenge to get rid of the root of the problems.

feel very very tired. 4 tuitions tomolo again. haiz. i have no time to meet with my frens at all or have ani bday celebration and the next off day is thurs which is so far away.

i think i will be taking a break from socialising. does it matter if its voluntary or involuntary? no one has actually even spoken to ask me whether i wan to celebrate my bday. hp asked me wat i wan to buy but i really have nothing i really wan. except more time with pple i treasure. forget the previous wish list, it was stupid. the sixoneders are going to buy me a pair of adidas, erh, dun think i'll get anithing else. but anyway, thanks to all the pple for being my frens when i'm feeling down and out.

bleary eyed at work again. today both supervisor and team leader were absent, so i had no instructions from anyone. the other team leader was unfrenly, as was my mentor, so i went back to my own team's pple as soon as they came to work. at least we could chat. these other teams were very superficial, always find fault with the smallest matters.

i must say, the logistics suck. one of the girls called the agency today to complain bout the job scope change and low pay. the agent gave us some crap reason like "u're paid $2 less to have less responsibilities.. anithing that's too stressful or u dun noe, just write down and pass to other pple to do. " WTH!!?!? this line coming from a person hiring for companies?! anione reading this, please dun let Careerhub help u source for employees, given this kind of attitude coming from the director of the company himself. no wonder he had to start a job agency to cheat pple's money; his attitude towards work sucKS!!!! we were pissed off by this and we decided to just finish up this job and forget bout extending ani contract with him.

agilent tech called me again. apparently, even though i said i couldn't make it for a interview, the manager liked me so much he was willing to organise a phone interview, cos prolly they needed some one urgently too.. also, they knew bout the starhub contract but he said it was ok, we go thru the interview first. oh well :) if got prospects of cos i'll leave the stupid agency.. :P but its a 6 month contract, i have to see how the japan thing goes..

had a very embarrassing incident. i smiled at this stranger whom i tot was my fren at first. then the guy looked at me for quite long, and i realised something was amiss. this guy looked similar but wasn't exactly alike. and then he smiled back. OH NO!!! by then i had realised i didn't noe this person at all, so i quickly finished my food and left in a hurry. he prolly thinks i was an over frenly person who smiles at every one. YIKES!!!

work on a sat tomolo. prolly listening in again. STUPID. BORING.

today is so tiring. i slept late last nite, and this morning had to wake at 6.30am.

the morning passed in a daze. cos i was doing nothing and yawning away. hahahahaha.

finally i was allowed to take calls. but the stupid HR hasn't prepared our IDs yet, so we can't do any freaking thing by ourselves. as least the 2nd half of the day i took calls in with a senior guiding us. suay enuff, i got like the most difficult pple in the country.. the kind that has grudges with everyone in the company. haiz. in the end just put them on hold and waited for the supervisor to take the call. no wonder they said its stressful. saying no to pple is really difficult. haiz.

had dinner with ed at clementi and went tuition after that. was so tired i was nodding off at tuition. my poor kid was influenced by me and was yawning thru the whole session. he was very nice though, told me to quickly finish giving him his spelling and then go home lor.. :S so embarrassing.. but i really hate waking up so early. haiz.

i have found a pattern in my life.

for the past 3-4 years, i have realised that a chain of similar events will happen at this time of the year. I'm not talking about the mooncake festival. (DUH!?!) its freakish, but although its different people i meet, but the events are freakishly similar in detail. its not gd things that happen, cos pple actually get hurt. but this time, i won't let the outcome be the same as the past few years.

good luck to me.

finally i'm going to start answering calls next tomorrow.. :) the CA pple are having such a GOOD LIFE!!! normal working hours, normal meal times, normal social life, why !!!!?? feel very cheated.. grr..

had dinner at genghis khan at taka.. although i didn't eat until i felt pukish, but i felt it was worth it. maybe cos it was my breakfast, lunch and dinner today. had 4 gigantic oysters (diameter 12cm) .. i stopped taking more cos i was getting abit sick of the taste. 2 bowls of sharks' fin, many pieces of abalone, and teppenyaki too. all the good food basically.. :) of cos i went with hp, since it was his off day today.. but we were both so tired from work..

i'm so sick of having to rush from work to tuition everyday. its just a few weeks more but still.. its very draining. mentally.

also, the jobs all come in at the wrong time. agilent tech called me this morning to ask me to go for an interview again. when i finally have another job. with a contract. DAMN! that time didn't even get back to me. i'm quite disgusted. haiz. but its definitely better paying than this.

tired. nitey.

i heard a fren's story bout how his gf's dad had mistresses/affairs and hence she feels that all men have to be controlled and is super possessive towards him. i was wondering how any woman can bear to be mistresses. isn't the idea of that someone u feel for (if not love) going back to the arms of another woman every time a horrible thing? maybe its cos they can't control their feelings, but marriage is a responsibility right? why do humans haf so many temptations? haiz.
think that human will is very weak. or maybe its just society being unacceptable of such things. i dun see lions being condemned for having many lionesses to bear his seed? hmmm..

u nv noe when u're awake. this is the time.

had my first afternoon shift yesterday. it was boring. still listening in, i wan to handle the live calls!

boo.

veri bored. tired too.

gd nite pple.

i must remember to go register for my jap class and JLPT tomolo.

and they finally informed me when the last round of interviews is. although i think the post is wrong? r&D manager? wats that??

tuition all the way today.. sianz.

i had quite a gd time working at nokia shop yesterday, but i wished there were more customers for me to talk to. time passes really slowly when u're standing around.

i managed to sell my xbox. :) at my price. take that all u disbelievers! :P

at least i'm only starting work at 11.30am tomolo. join me for dinner in ayer rajah anione?

dear. please dun be angry at me. cute is as cute goes. we chat bout our other halves. thats wat we mostly chat about. and the movie outing was with all the colleagues. it was ok oni. i realli miss u. do remember last nite kz.

i love u.

ok.. i'm drunk. sober. but drunk.

just came back from hp's colleague's bday celebration.. had 5 glasses of chivas with coke. :S and beer. and i'm still alive.. forgive me for my typos.. :P

aniway, i realli am that suay. should have performed less gd in the training. cos apparently wat i wan dun matter. in the interest of the company, i have been assigned to billing. !!!
separation from the cute guy :( but at lunch today, we shared you2 cai4. ok la, nothing scandalous muahahahah. oh well.. nothing to look forward to at work animore.. maybe occasional hi-s and byes.. haiz.. today i reached work at 8.20am. definitely an improvement from being just late at 9.10am the past few days. the bus frequency sucks. mmm.. ok.. i'm abit drunk here so i'm blabbering. at least i oni need to report to work at 11.30am on monday :P and i get shift allowance from working late.

will be working in century square tomolo.. :S nokia on the job training. bah. so far! but i figured this will be the last weekend i will be in control of my timing, so better slot the training here. aniway, will be paid wor..

ok, i better go sleep.. have a gd weekend every one...

finally finished training today.. tomorrow we're supposed to listen in on calls..

interestingly, finally by today, i managed to speak more than 5 sentences to edwin. he's the cute guy in my training group.. :) i was buying ice cream after lunch and i don't know why he waited for me while the rest of the girls left.. in the end, i sat at the bus stop with the rest of the guys and chatted with them while they smoked, read the papers and me eating my ice cream. we managed to find some common pple we both knew, since he was same batch as me from NUS.. and i think we prolly end up in the same section cos me, him and another girl got wat we choose (after drawing lots) and hopefully the trainer won't be so hardless to split us up..:S

scored highest in the group for the pdt knowledge test yesterday :P muahaha.. but today was quite sian, kept falling asleep. so cold some more.. have SOP test tomolo :( at least tomorrow will be looking at the systems.. not so bad..

went for nokia training after that, it was quite boring today, just had the old promoters present the phones. and then it turns out i'm supposed to have an on the job training next weekend, but i have to work my shift work in starhub le, so pushed it forward to this sat instead.. so this sat, 1-6pm, i'll be working in Century Square for Nokia... booooo... but at least thats for $10.50per hour.. ;)

had supper with jon and tim, told them a disgustingly (pukish type of disgusting) but it was hilarious to me, and i couldn't stop laughing... :P tim drove us back home (thanks!) and we went up to the haunted hillview house to take a look outside that morbid place. YUCKY!!! eerie and super dark with barb wired high fences.. tim said he went in b4 and it was a gothic place and half renovated?! hmm... maybe something happened to scare the workers off...

now have to study, do my tuition kid's maths and bathe le... Yikes...

I'm so tired. training today again, test oso, it was ok but i forgot that it was a prepaid bill. hmm.. aniway. cos today training was in a smaller room, meeting style, so it was more fun and we all got to noe everyone better.

rushed off to meet hp after work for a quick dinner then off to tuition again.

woke up feeling faint. as in giddy when i stand up. i think its due to lack of sleep.

n why isn't anione going for the nokia training tomolo?!? tot say b4 going le?? now i've to figure out how to get there within half hour by myself. shitz.

training today first day on product knowledge.. there's a test tomolo..

i woke up at 6.30am, damn it. so tired.. sleepy. and dun need to wear smart casual, just wear jeans and blouse can le.

zzz.

yay! today payday for all 3 tuition kids. muahahahah! i'm rich again!! (richer than b4?) hmm..

so basically piah-ed from one place to another today, reached home at 6 to have a quick dinner b4 going to my aunt's place to help install some stuff on their comp (again!) .. thankfully, its the last time.. :P

now have to finish up my jap hw and read up some C b4 bed.. hafta sleep early tonite, cos tomolo starting work le.. Sianz..

my schedule for the coming week is disgusting:
Monday to Friday: 8.30am - 6.30pm: Work, 7+pm - 9+pm: tuition;
Saturday: rest (?)
Sunday: 10am - 9pm: Tuition (4 sessions)

terrible.. boo hoo!